"The principal in my son's school threatened me that I 'would be sorry' I finally heard back from the Superintendent. Now we are meeting with lawyers to see what can be done. What's our opinion?"

"hi i am writing because i need to know who to talk to or write to about and incident that took place at my sons high school involving a 15 year old girl and the vice principle.. i have spoken with the superintendent and he believes that the vice principles behavior was 'okay' because he said he was sorry and justified his behavior by saying 'he just lost it... on april 30 th the young lady was in the vice principles office having a discussion with him (a very loud discussion) some bad language was passed between the two them and the vice principle obviously had enough because he got rite in this young ladies face with his fist drawn in the air an stated ' if i could f...... pop you i would' sorry for the language but that is what he said, he admitted to the principle and the superintendent that this did take place and stated that he 'just lost it' i am writing because this was very wrong on the principles part an am personally concerned about my child safety when he 'just loses' again.. like i said i have expressed my concerns to the superintendent .. there is nothing justifiable about this incident and it should be looked at but i do not believe they are going to look at it.. We teach our children that swearing and hitting is wrong.. then we have someone that our children are suppose to look up to for guidance through there school years behave in this manner and get away with it because he is sorry and he ' just lost it' doesnt work that way when a child in school just loses it !!!. it should be no different just because he is a vice principle... so if you can't help me could you guide me into the right direction. i am from wisconsin so dont know if you can help me A very concerned parent"

"I have a safety issue in a private school sector in which the principal is guilty of 4 of the 7 above red flags. We were forced to remove our daughter from the private school in order to provide her with a safe enviornment away from an aggressive student in which the Principal 'turned the other cheek' and avoided confrontation with the parents of the aggressive student; only to place the discipline of the student and meeting with the parents with the teacher time and again. As the altercations became more aggressive, the Principal still felt she should not be involved with the aggresive students parents....any advice on how I should deal with the private school sector on this isssue. I do not know who oversees the private school sector?"

"I would call the news.People that are doing something wrong hate that...it may help.Don't give up!"

"Interesting article with some good advice but what if the Superintendent is also the problem."

"Unfortunately, in my school district the superintendents have no intention on responding to parent complaints. The Board of Education will not deal with the problems either. They promptly send us right back to this bad apple principal to work out problems. He makes all of these promises but of course does not follow through and the situations get worse. He even uses some inexperienced or lazy teachers to retaliate against the children of the more vocal parents. At this point most of the parents are simply silently enduring. The children's academics are suffering. He takes no responsibility but attempts to shove off responsibility and blame onto the children and the parents. One particular teacher will not give back graded papers or tests. Won't even let the parents or children see papers or tests. Even during prearranged conferences she comes empty handed and the Principal does nothing. He knows he has all the power and let's the parents know if we so much as dare! to ask any questions. What can I do as a concerned parent? "

"My son was upgraded from proficient level to advance level, which was long over due since he has above 94 averages. He is doing well in everything except social studies. He had an average above 97 and with the new teacher has major issues that I believe are related to her teaching style. Even though we studied for his latest test extensively for several days and quizzed him at home his test result was 75. The test had 37 questions including subject China, Japan, North Korea, South Korea. The teacher included a few trick question like 'why did woman do better in communism in Japan?' (trick: Japan does not have a communist government). In general I am not satisfied with the teaching style- too much home work and too many tests. I spoke with the guidance office that referred me to the teacher. Two weeks ago we had a pleasant conversation and I expressed my concern. After the last test I spoke with her today and she accused that I’ve been disrespectful to her when we talked prev! iously. She took this very personal and I am afraid my son will suffer for this. I am looking for advice on how to handle this issue without compromising my son’s progress with this teacher. I'd really like to hear from some one that can relate to this subject. "

"Write up or file incidences with the district. In some situations, when trying to communicate with the principal or a particular teacher, your statements can be ignored. In other words your complaints blocked off with 'well, your child this, your child that' not putting any focus on the staff member of which the complaint is about."

"I really need to know what I should do about my sons school. The school had an honor roll ceremony this weekend, there was also an special famous, sports athelete guest that was to suprise the kids at this event. All in all 176 kids made honor roll,and the honor roll grade was lowered to 80 from 85. I'm not sure if this act was ok by the principal, but it seems morally wrong."

" here is what happened with my child's principal.It is all true Making a long story very short. the principal calls me up and tells me my son is acting in a very strange way she says ' you have to come here right now ' I replied I'm not at home right now it will take me about a half hour to get there. I arrive and she sits me down and starts telling me she feels my son is a danger to the kids in school and he needs to be seen by a shrink and don't feel like only crazy people go to shrinks because my children and I go regularly. I asked her what did he do she then told me 'as he was sitting at his desk he started to spit on the desk and the floor and got his hands and rubbed it into his face' .She then told me she thinks home schooling would be better for him I was shocked so I told her let me speak to him and ask him what happened in front of her When I asked him ' did you do this what the principal was saying ?' He said no I didn't the principal said no he did right away and told me I'll call in his teacher to make see what he says His teacher comes in and the principal then asks didn't you tell me that he done all this. He looked at her with a strange look and said I never told you that. She then said she was sorry to my son for being mad at him. so we went home and I sat down and talked to my son and asked him what is going on in school? He told me after I asked him so many times that there was alot of kids beating him up,cursing and calling him names I was so shocked and told him don't be afraid I'll talk to the principal and tell her what is going on here.He told me please don't talk in front of the kids at school he was afraid they would know he told on them. So I went to her on the 30th of oct. and told her all of this she said we will have to get to the bottom of this ,but your son has spitted on children and was causing her to be very concerned about his mental health. I told her well we will think about him seeing a shrink since it's up to me if I feel he is in need of one(so I thought) the next day on oct. 31 halloween there school was having a parade and i went to give my son his costume and as i walked to his class room the teacher told me he was in the bathroom,So I went in the bathroom and seen about six kids surounding him and I asked whats going on in here? the kids left really fast and started to say I'm gonna knock him out your son is a s.o.b . I was shocked again and asked my son what happened but he didnt say anything to me and he didn't want to go on the parade .His teacher came and told me you can take him home with you since school was almost over anyway. Later that day I recived a letter saying my son was suspended for two days for spitting and hitting a boys butocks . Then on friday the people from child abuse comes knocking on my door ,They had recived a call that my son has bizzare behavor and he has a blank look in his eyes when asked a question. As they were reading all this to me I could not belive what I was hearing They then gave me a phone number for him incase he wants to hurt himself then they spoke to my son and asked him did you ever think of hurting yourself or others? He said no as all this is going on I'm thinking what is going on here. monday comes and I go to speak to the principal and want to ask her about the bullying that is going on.She then tells me she don't feel it would be right to talk to me without everyone present and to make a appointment on weds. I asked her who do you mean everyone ? she said the shrink and the people from the child abuse and some other people I can't remeber I told her but what does that have to do with the kids that are hurting my son? she said we will talk about it weds. At this point I know she is a very bad principal and I don't know what she is trying to do. Ok so I wait until weds. and go to the school and she tells me we made the appontment for friday now I told her wait I have to speak to you now about my son I waited for so long and I'm not going to wait for friday to speak about this so we started to talk about my son getting beaten in school and I told her all that he said to me,She then tells me I looked into his story and i found nothing happening to him he is never left alone and there is never that many kids in the bathroom at one time,no children are ever in the hall by them self.So I asked in other words you don't belive him? and your gonna do nothing about this She said we will watch him more but I asure you this is a story he is telling. I then asked her(the principal) If anything happens to my son in this school who is responsable? She replied after a second and said 'the city and the board of education..and This conversation is over!' I told her so your throwing me out of your office? and you don't want to hear about my concerns? she said nothing,So I left once I get home no more then ten minutes later the principal calls me to say my son is in the nurse's office he was kicked very hard and was crying I said I'll be there now When I get there I go into the nurse's office and ask her to see my son,She said What do you mean and what are you talking about ,she then started to call the main office so I left and went to the main office and asked them where is my son the principal called me and told me he is hurt and in the nurse's office They said we didn't hear of anything and they don't know where he is So now I'm getting paniced I ask another person in the school the security guard and she dont know what I'm talking about to then as I'm going to is teacher upstairs who do i see is the principal I ask her where is my son and how is he? she says 'I don't know' then she tells me I have suspended the child that kicked him I told her good so now you belive him She replied no I don't belive his stories I told her what are you waiting for to see him in blood before you start to belive him? your insance I told her and i walked away. went to his teacher and asked him about my son and where is he,He said I don't know where he is but he is ok and Ill help you find him after walking all around the school with him we found him in the lunch room, I asked him if he was ok and checked where he was hit I told the teacher I'm taking him home. As I get home 20mins. later the police call and leave a message they want to speak to me.so when I call they say we are at the school and I have to go there and talk to them I said fine I'll be there in about 30mins. I walk in the school and go to the office the principal looks with a mean face and points they are in here waiting for you. so I walk in and they start telling me that they had a call from the school that i was combative(don't know what that means)and I told them I was a nervouse wreck because of everything that is going on with this schoool and the beatins my son is getting from the kids and to top it all off nobody knew where my son was for 15mins. when we was looking for him so they said we will file this complaint and my son will be transferd to another school. I said thats fine with me What you are reading now is just a short version of what I'm going threw right now if I was to wright it all down it would be a book I think this is the worst principle I have ever seen in my life and now I don't know what to expect next from her tell me what do you think I can do? "

"Please send feedback about how I should proceed. My 5 year old son was 'restrained' by the pricipal on the first day of kindergarden. This action resulted in a rug burn and bruise on his temple. Law enforement states this is not a criminal matter and refused to file a report."

"I had a major problem with my children's elementary school principal. Bottom line: she didn't take severe bullying (actually, assault) seriously. She had a asst. principal who was a 'yes' man. My child, a gifted, quiet student, is still dealing with the after effects of the bullying. This article was enlightening- my principal clearly demonstrated 5 out of the 7 'warning signs'. She has since 'left' the district. Believe it or not, we are located in a very affluent community and a top-rated schoool district. Bad principals can be anywhere. I'm sadddened thatI didn't pursue action against her with the superintendent."

"What do you do if your school teachers and aides and even parents have a problem with the principal. What can we do to get rid of the principal and get another one hopefully much better than the one we have now."

"Going to the Superintendent only works if this person responds to parents. Our superintendent doesn't. The parents in our district were so upset with the current superintendent they had marches against her. While I don't think she is as bad as some say, she's not open to communicating with parents. Good luck trying to get help from our superintendent, it probably will not work."

"As a parent and a public high school teacher; I appreciate your emphasis on contacting the teacher first when there is a problem. Many times I am learning of a problem at the same time as the vice principal, the pricipal and the superintendent. Parents in our district tend to copy their emails to anyone and everyone when they are dissatisfied. Often the problem could have been easily rectified by a simple email to the classroom teacher"

"Favoritism had caused more than one teacher and family to remove themselves from our small school in Kaneohe. It is very sad when a principal comes on board and tried to recreate the school in her own image. We loved the school, but our kids are not returning."

"Good article. How does one fight Principal favoritism? Especially those after union activists. "

"This article certainly points out some areas of concern, but it is not a black and white issue. First, teachers cannot 'rat out' principals without clear documentation and even then, they may be suspect for many reasons. I think suggesting that teachers contact their superintendents is unsound advice. If you are a teacher and have not been certified as a supervisor and have never been a supervisor, department chair or head teacher, I think you have little backing you up and indeed, may find that you don't completely understand the duties a principal must fulfill. This article makes the job sound very simple and it is not. You've neglected to mention that central office adminnistrations can be weak, school boards in turmoil and many other factors. I think this article makes some good points, but it is not as simple as a one page article suggests. If you are unsuccessful & find no support for your 'complaints' then you will no doubt be 'closely observed and supervised' and that is within the legal liimits of your supervisor/principal. Just a thought. "

"I think this is a awesome article. The only problem I have with this is I did exactly what this told me to do, and I did not get no support. The principal supported the teacher, so I called the superintendant, and the superintenant supports the principal. Where do the parents come in on this and get any support. What is wrong with our school system now days. I am a teacher myself, I am not saying you have to go and fire all the time a teacher, but sometimes adjustments with our children would just be nice without the parents having to go through a hassle. For a teacher to try something new, espically if it is her first year in teaching. A parent does know their own child allot better then a teacher knows them. Teachers do need to be open a little more and try things that parents mention to them with their children. It is to benefit them, not to hurt them. It has worked for me to be open with my parents, I promise it will work for them. Teacher's in public school need to be told to ask for help from parents who are willing to come in and volunteer for help. I have volunteered myself and they do not call me, and I have seen in many places that they could use help in taking the kids from class room to classroom so they are not out by themselves walking and they will not just decide to walk off from the school or someone in the school decide to take them. Trust me, I have seen it happened, it can happen again. No wonder more people are going to the private schools and paying for better education. Think about it. I am here not to tear our system down, but to help improve it. I do care for our kids. I want our school system to get better. We have to go where their is the help and I do not see that here. Their are to many children in a classroom per teacher, I am someone who would come into a school and volunteer in different classrooms and grade the children's work, help children read, just so the teachers can have more time on their hands to take a child to the side and work with someone who is having proble! ms in a area. Right now the teachers are not willing to stay after school and work with a child. I have done that for years to help them understand. That is our job. Any teacher that is not willing to do that, they do not need to be in this field. A child can sense that if a teacher wants to help them. If that help is not their, they are going to feel helpless. "

"Talk about a great Principal, Ginny Maiwald at Bernal Intermediate School within Oak Grove School District. During her first year as principal she has performed task which I had almost come to believe were not possible. As a parent it is important to have communication channels and intelligence in the running of the education system She has every sign of a great principal plus more. I work as a secretary at a public high school and currently am working for a principal who falls far short of an acceptable principal. Principals are often overlooked when everything is going right. I feel that she is the Role Model for what a principal is! "

"I wholeheartedly agree with your insightful definition of a great principal. It is unfortunate that there are still 'bad principals' out there. Here in the County I live in one particular principal defines what a bad principal is. She's rigid. unapproachable, totally interested in the numbers not the person and very biased. Her tone is felt throughout the school. Children act out, teachers teach only the self motivated children while the rest a deemed behavioral problems heading for retention. Bravo, to all you caring and dedicated principals out there, I only wish my children were in your schools! "

"Good principals are hard to find. We had a great principal and now we have a poor principal who only takes care of problems with his school when he wants to. He looks the other way when there are real problems and tells us that he has no authority over the type of problem we have. We have problems with the lunches, the bus drivers, and when and where to drop our children off at school. At the beginning of the year we were expected to drive past the school and throw our children out the door without stopping because we were not allowed to park on school grounds or the side streets around the school, it wasn't until half way through the year that he agreed to let us park on school grounds at a certain time. He has taken the kids' favorite lunch food away from the whole school just because 1 class was to loud, and now he denies it. He has been caught in many lies by many parents. He is one of them principals who say what people want to hear and when it comes back on him he threatens to call the police. As a matter of fact today I caught him in 3 lies within 5 minutes. He is a known racist, the african american kids can fight on school property and not get nothing done to them, but when a caucasion kids says 'freakin ghetto' he gets kicked off the bus for 3 days. Where are this principals priorities? He was once a high school principal but said he wanted to go to an elementary school so he can catch the kids at a young age, what does he want to teach them? Does he want to teach them to say what people want to hear and then lie about it when they are confronted, or threaten people with the police? I think the police have much more important things to do rather than come to the rescue of a person caught in his lies. "

"Your article on principals reminds me that there should be some way to recognize the great principals in this country. Do you know of any Great Principal award or venue? In Easton, Pennsylvania, we are fortunate to have Mr. Robert Steckel as principal of our fifth and sixth grade middle school - Easton Area Middle School. Mr. Steckel's school has 1500 children from six elementary schools. The challenge he faced when the school was established and continues to face in these dangerous times is enormous, and yet his leadership has won the trust and confidence of parents, fostered the support and participation of teachers, and encouraged the enthusiasism for learning that is the foundation of a good school. He is a very modest and unassuming individual, who would never want to call attention to himself or the work he does. I feel fortunate to have seen a great principal in action. "

"I agree wholeheartely with the comments written from Virginia on 2/24/03. I am a teacher that will leave the profession at the end of this school year. I can't continue to mediate conflicts in the classroom and be 'polically correct' in everything that I do. My students can't read or write well enough to pass ordinary tests, let alone standarized tests. I want to teach them to read and write, not be a referee between students and adults. (By the way, I have a Masters Degree and over 10 years of teaching experience.) Amen to 'Help the Principals and Teachers that really worry and care about our children to focus and educate instead of spend time in stress where the environment is of a click type or simply not willing to accept extraordinary people with love and talent. ' "

"Great Article but does it mean more than eyewash? Just an observation but I notice no reference to politics in your article. I have seen teachers and principals that are afraid to do the best job because of the politics in the District offices. I have seen them under heavy stress attempting to provide for our children the best environment, care and learning experience in America only to be shot down with not being a yes person for the political agenda but being a truly caring person with the welfare of the children first and formost in their thoughts. I think an article on what makes a good school should include a well rounded statement on protocol and mediation between the administrators and govenors of the district. If we don't cooperate and create a mutually favorable environment in which to work, exchange and promote ideas, concepts to educate and protect the children then we are at a loss. I will see the effects of both ends of the spectrum but more importantly I see us in a static area not really being able to exceed and hope not existing on the agenda of the everyday educator that is not allowed to teach but must be constrained to a tightly bound syllabus concocted to ensure stability of the political structure in the state or district education heirarchy. Help the Principals and Teachers that really worry and care about our children to focus and educate instead of spend time in stress where the environment is of a click type or simply not willing to accept extraordinary people with love and talent. "

"Great article. As I work with my principal, I honestly wonder how and why this cold human being is the leader of an educational institution where young minds are being shaped. Balance and flexibilty too is important in leadership. This man definitely has discipline, but compassion understanding and ethics are lacking, particulary with our immigrant children. "

"Having read this article, I feel compelled to share my good fortune with your audience. I am a teacher who works with a wonderful principal (Kimberly Cockrell, Richard Allen Edgemont, Dayton, OH) who is an extremely competent leader. She is the person described in the first part of your article - dedicated, focused on student learning, approachable, and a keen problem solver. This helps make my job enjoyable. Way to go, Ms. Cockrell! "

"I think this article is much needed. However given the cutbacks in the Boston Public Schools finding a good school is one thing, being able to get into the school is another. Any ideas on how to better facilitate that one? - Sharyn, Boston, MA "

"Right on! My daughter's Principal, Mr. Rash, is a great principal. He is patient, understanding, and runs an elementary with great care! He has sat with us on my daughter's discipline strategy and explained why things are the way they are. He believes in the old fashioned values like respect for self and others. He tries to explain when she is in trouble why and that this is something she and we as parents need to work on. "

"This article jumped out at me because my husband and I are both teachers and aspiring administartors. I just recently left the charter schools to work in a school district confident that there would be more professionalism, effective communication, and resources to help children. I have been disappointed because the principal I work for currently in a K-5 school knows the curriculum and resources, but does not know how to communicate. She also does not know what is develomentally appropriate for her K-3 students, becaue she was a Junior High teacher and is extremely rigid and unapproachable. I was appreciative of the article because I am experiencing firsthand how the principal sets the tone for the school and it is true that parents need to interview the principal , as well as teachers before they place their child in a school-personality, communication, and beliefs make all the difference in the success of an educational environment. I can only hope and try to take what I am learning and what I have experienced to be an effective principal. "